“Don’t punish me any more!
I am about to die from your blows”.
Ps 39:10 GNB
Life can be hard and cruel. Some get born into situations of extreme poverty and poor education prevents them from ever shaking free from the marginal existence that dogs them all their days. Then those who are victims in war situations face another kind of suffering. And there are those who experience sexual harassment and abuse for years. Others go from one illness to another. Some know a combination of adversities that make life seem like one long trial.
The man who wrote Psalm 39 seems to have wavered between hope and faith on the one hand and despair and anger on the other. Many suffering people have swings of a similar nature. They try to jolly themselves up one minute, then sound the depths of resignation, wretchedness and despair the next. In this verse he is at the end of his tether with God for allowing, indeed causing his intense suffering. It was so bad that he sensed that he was about to die and he wondered if it could get any worse. Since God was the author and ruler of life he was, thought the psalmist, responsible for all his troubles. Since he was near to death it had become about as bad as it could get.
You will probably feel like that yourself at times. Troubles, illnesses, accidents, and violence can happen – and when they do they can “throw” you. When many come together you can be driven to dark despair and wonder when it will all end. Turn then to II Corinthians 12:9 and read again Paul’s words “My grace is sufficient for you”. And know that God will never completely abandon you.
Lord, help me to pull through even the darkest night.